Just another saturday morning

Each morning starts with the flood of emotions and memories, enough to wet the eyes. The minutes just refuse to pass by. So I sit down to jab the keyboard with some junk to thow out. The mind is clouded with thoughts of all the accepted rejection I am getting. Am I really dragging it too far? I guess I am not. Or I am? Dunno.

It is not an easy process to start the day. But I guess, the day will not stop, even if i try to hold the hands of time. I never knew I would need help from third quarters, I never imagined myself to be in such a state of mind. But I guess, this time does come up in each life. I did not face it in early phases of life, so I it coming late to me. I am trying to grow out of myself and would do it, and I do not think I need to get supports now. Or do I? i am aware that weaker crutches will not take me anywhere far, but at-least ई shall be ...... on something, keeping myself occupied, if not entirely on my own.

And then, here is something for the one who has recently started looking towards me with amused and restless eyes.

I do notice the subtle remarks in the not so subtle talks. I am weak these days and may trip my steps, but will try to retain my balance. . Do not try to find solace in me. I have nothing much left on that front that can be useful. Whatever I had, has been put to a wasteful use. Tomorrow, you would too come up and tell me the same. So, better mind your heart and don't put that effort on me. You will find nothing here and you shall lose what you would regret later. The time. You are young and brave; and have a long way to go.

Just understand, do not put away the future for a sweeter day today. Though this is not my original philosophy of life, but this will suit you better. So before you let me use you as a support system, which I think I have started to, already; try to keep your personal life away and secure, and do not stop your efforts to move ahead. I have grown old and because I have lived in moments, does not mean you should also do so. So, stop fluttering those eyes and carry on. Do not soften your voice to me, as I do get affected, but the ill effect will be more on your future. Live on.

Hey I do sound like a confused lot. Don't I? Or Do I make sense?