Surrender

My possessiveness is raising its head once again. And the feeling itself is getting on my head. My arteries can feel the rush of possessiveness rich blood rushing out of my heart, and the pressure is more it can handle. The blue veins seem to be swollen with the feeling of 'mine' and feel like bursting out. The eyes are getting blurry, and the thin lines between self esteem and ego seems to vanish into thin air.

Once again, I can feel that the world belongs to me, and just me. My hands are up to grab more than they can handle, and my mind is blinded with so much of egocentricity.

I feel like the center of the universe and everything is spinning around me, on my whims and fancies. I sit in the middle and everyone seems to move around me.

Soon, I reach a mental belief that I can change the world, and everything around me.
Let me try myself, once again in life.

I raise a hand and try to move a small needle kept nearby.

It does not move. At all.

I try again.

Nothing.

I feel angry, push the needle, and ... nothing again. I use both my hands to move it, failing again. I increase my effort, push it with all my force, without being able to move it even a micron.
I scorn, I swear, I cry, and I beg, but the needle refuses to budge.

I decide to wake up.... to my small self. To my nothingness.

God .. I surrender to you. Do, what you can do with me. Put me to the best use you can.