pigeonhole existence

This morning, I feel my feet are cemented in my eternal living grave and my hands are stretching towards the sky. I want to break free. I know this is impossible. The only way I can fly is to chop my my limbs.

I feel too timid to cut of that piece of my flesh and blood which has a part of my soul in it, from my body. But I just cannot live the way I am living now. It is getting too dark everyday.
Its not that I don't have a sky to fly. It is that my life is so bloated with my fixedness that has been a part of my identity since ages. I have lived in a cave world, and I shall continue to do so, till my feet get freed. I am afraid, by then, it will be too late and I will have no sky left for me to fly. I don't know if my sky will wait for me. Guess... only time has the answer.
Depression is building up and so is my migraine. I have always said that everything is a phase and shall pass away, but I guess this phase I am into, will pass away only with my life. Another few decades to live this way. Once the birds will have wings, learn to fly, and shall fly off, I might too.

The day has started in a rotten way, and I don't know how the rest of it will go. In a few hours, I shall try to live a little more again, pumping fuel in me to work through my day. And then return to my pigeonhole existence. Just like a pigeon who closes the eyes believing that no one will see him.

ROFL